If you and your spouse have decided to uncouple amicably, divorce mediation is a great way to resolve many conflicts that arise in the process of dissolving the marriage. Working with an experienced divorce mediator and an attorney has its perks—you can keep your intimate details private, go at your own pace, and work toward an agreement that effectively meets the needs of both parties while staying out of court.
But mediation has its own set of perils, which can be avoided if you spend a little time preparing for the mediation process. David R. Phillips shares some steps to take prior to booking an appointment with your divorce mediator.
#1- Research Legal Coaching
Divorce mediation allows for reaching a desirable outcome that is guided by, but not bound by, the court laws. Legal coaches can help you figure out what is best for the entire family according to your unique situation.
Professionals can guide you after listening to your issues, intentions, priorities, concerns, and goals so the strategy positions you to leverage the best tactics to negotiate reasonable and unreasonable demands by your spouse.
#2- Choose the Mediator Wisely
Many types of mediators now exist, each one having their own unique mediation style. They can be evaluative, facilitative, and even transformative in their approach.
Facilitative mediators foster productive discussions, especially for couples who tend to argue a lot. Meanwhile, evaluative mediators clarify the legal merit of each request made. And transformative mediators play the role of counselors so you can discuss your conflicts with them in a safe space to get productive solutions.
When researching, ask your potential mediators about their preferred style, schedules, and availability and whether they hold virtual sessions or prefer in-person mediation. Also, ask them if they will prepare, fill, and process the divorce paperwork or if you will need to hire additional help for that.
Request an upfront retainer and inquire about their certification and training to ensure they are knowledgeable and experienced enough to help you with your divorce mediation.
#3- Gather all Relevant Financial Information
Whether you have the financial documents or they are with your spouse, collect all the information ahead of time so you know everything you have and when it was acquired.
You must have some sort of financial documentation as proof so the money can be divided adequately without anyone experiencing a loss due to fogged memory. You can also consider compiling all relevant documents in a Dropbox or Google Drive so they are easily accessible by all from anywhere and at any time.
#4- Determine the Non-Negotiables
Negotiating a complex financial contract can be daunting, especially when the intention is to take steps that benefit everyone as you begin the journey to end one of the most important relationships to date.
Identify things you are willing to give up versus the ones you cannot let go of at any cost. For instance, maybe your family home is a lucrative investment, but you do not want the children to be distressed when they have to change schools.
Think about the things you will be willing to give up in exchange. Financial support, retirement benefits, and other non-negotiables can also prolong the divorce process. If any item will not be important to you in three months, consider letting it go!
How David R. Phillips can help with Divorce Mediation
Whether you are struggling with a handful of pesky issues or plenty of problems that you and your ex cannot resolve, mediation can be a great option for splitting up amicably. Divorce mediation allows voicing opinions productively rather than starting fistfights in courts and letting the judges decide the fate of your marriage.
David R. Phillips is a family law attorney dedicated to helping you live happily after… just separately. Dial 219-929-7060 to set up an appointment!
He can provide you with all the information, support, and guidance needed to file for divorce, custody, alimony, visitation, and asset division, among other things. Our competent attorney is also experienced and qualified to represent you in other family lawsuits, personal injury, and criminal law cases.